The best advice

OK, I have this strange thing. I like advice. I almost collect it like you would stamps or coins. I love to hear what someone's great grandma thought was the most important thing to know. "Burp the baby at midnight in a swamp and he'll never have warts" or "Only put whites in or the color will transfer" It's all fascinating to me. I think I like the idea that our individual experiences can make someone else's life better. And our suffering can help keep someone else from suffering through that same problem. So I was thinking today that Bzzing is a lot like advice. "This brand is better than that one. I know. I tried it out." So maybe as BzzAgents, you guys are buttinskis like me and love giving advice. It all counts, from the esoteric to the day to day practical. From granny's cooking hints to high tech gizmo hints. Love lives, parenting, money... it's all good. I make no guarantees to FOLLOW the advice. I just like hearing it.

So... hit me with your best shot!

Oh! I almost forgot to give any!

Let's see... the best advice I give would probably be to new parents: buy a baby swing. They are like gifts from God. The funniest advice was one I read in a magazine. A woman overheard a father talking to his soon to be married son on his wedding day about the "marriage bed". She snuck closer so she could eavesdrop and heard him explain that whenever they moved to a new place he needed to pick a side first, before his wife got the chance. And he should always pick the side furthest from the door. And the woman listening in was trying to figure out why and then realized that it was because whoever was by the door was the one who had to get up in the night with the kids!

Right now the only thing coming to mind is : If you do what you have always done, then you will get what you have always gotten. It is good advice for anyone with any complaint. Maybe after some coffee I will come up with some more.

buy a large porkloin, then cut it into pork chops.

put a bar of ivory soap under the foot of your bed you wont get charlie horses

and my sage advise, idle hands are the devils workshop

If you get lost driving:

turn right.... just keep turning right until you are back where you started

when all else fails turn right...my motto for driving

chelle wrote:buy a large porkloin, then cut it into pork chops.

put a bar of ivory soap under the foot of your bed you wont get charlie horses

and my sage advise, idle hands are the devils workshop

Thank you so much for this, I can't wait to try it and I use ivory on my face and kids so I always have tons of bars in the closet. How cool is that, here is a link I found on it, you rock!!!!!!!

http://www.peoplespharmacy.org/archives/home_remedies/soap_under_the_sheets_for_rls_leg_cramps.php?page=3

Teach your own children about sex. Answer questions openly and truthfully. They should reflect your family morals rather than society's.

Children have little to do with the marriage relationship. What goes on between a husband and a wife is their business alone. The quickest way to damage children is to get them involved in disagreements. They hurt easily.

If you want to raise an artist, never ask what a picture is; never compare the art with someone else's or say it doesn't look right (ears, in art, do not have to drawn separately on each side of the head); when a child picks a color it is exactly the one he or she wants to use so blue people are perfectly fine.

You, perhaps, are the only one who will ever love your child without reservation. Make sure they have good manners and social skills.

There are only two kinds of people in the world, those you want to be bothered with and those you don't.

People do not change. We can only divert bad habits into something worthy. Men, especially, do not miraculously change after marriage. What you see is what you get. If he is stingy while you are dating him, he will be stingy after you marry.

excellent advice Pearly

mine isn;t as good
don't pi$$ in the wind
same for electrical fences
don't spit on a rollercoaster

love it tara!!
never squat when your wearin spurs fits with those


great advise pearly!

mrschia, I swear by it. I did it while preg and hubby was having awful ones too. I didnt tel him I did it, but asked him to write down when hw had one, that I was trying to find a connection between the food he ate and the cramps (total BS, but he is a man ) 3 onths later he asked what I had changed since he hadnt had one. I told him, he just shook his head and walked away

Hey Tara, those are cool!

Chelle, when I read yours, I immediately thought of how I could have used that when I was pregnant. Boy, I had some really painful charlie horses. They made me cry. I finally learned that if you flex your leg in opposite direction (I think it's the opposite) that it will relieve it. BUT it is sort of a slightly painful process. I am passing yours on.

Men are stupid (okay just most of them) if you want something from them- say it. Many don't take hints very well.

The soap advice is so crazy I just might have to try it. Both of my boys used to wake up in the middle of the night with growing pains in their feet when they were in a growth spurt. I wonder if the soap would have helped then?

My grandma's advice is "You can't die until you've eaten a peck of dirt." And she usually added "I just hope I don't have to eat mine all at once."

Can we give the worst advice, too? Can we, huh, huh? We can learn from that, too.

I read these two tidbits in a pregnancy magazine. I swear I did. Worst. Advice. Ever!

#1. Buy the same size you usually wear in a maternity bra - they are sized to accommodate your growing figure.

#2. When you come home from the hospital with your new baby, ask friends and relatives to give you a few days alone before visiting. OMG, I snubbed my mother and she never did bond with my kids. Because she was pissed at me. And it took her almost 2 weeks before she would come see the baby ( she did see him at the hospital)

Yep, do not snup the baby. I was a premature baby. Eventually, I came home and my grampa came and paid a visit to see his new granddaughter. He took one look at me and walked straight out of our home - not saying one word to my Mom.

He returned, a few months later and my Mom questioned him - How come you did not say anything about your grand-daughter...his repy...geez, _____, I did not she would live.

Trust me, he rolls in his grave.

Hehehehe, Tara, when BR cant make me understand something, he will get smart and ask if I need him to get a crayon and draw me a picture.

Years ago I wanted my dining room painted, he said he would do it, never would. Finaly I bought the paint, it sat for months, so I taped the windows, more months, Then I opened it up, painted a 2 ft area and went to work. Came home an it was painted. He asked why I did that. I told him I was drawing him a picture. LOL I had never asked him past the first time. but come to find out he thinks I am not capable of painting with out leaving streaks, or painting out of line. So if I start, he takes over. LOL

But my advise is NEVER NAG. You wont like the results OR the consequences.

Advice, Best

Remember when you fight with someone, you are not the only one fighting.

chelle wrote: So if I start, he takes over. LOL

My mom used to swear by this...if she wanted dad to do a project she
wouldn't ask, just start it herself....he would take over immediately!

my hubby is far to lazy for this to work. He will happily sit back and let me do it my way. So I hide his stuff and tell him he can have it back when _____ is done.

Here's one:
When you see a man standing in the rain, don't argue with him and try to get him inside. People passing by see two fools arguing in the rain...

Oh this is so much fun! I love all the advice, good and bad. Pearly, you are SMART!

My Dad taught me, if in doubt don't.

another favorite:

If you have to ask if something looks good on you, odds are it doesn't or you already know the answer and just want to hear it.

When taking the notion to travel - Always Wear Underwear

Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!

Don't save every piece of your childs artwork or crafts. Group them together and take a picture of them (really special ones take individual photos of.) Make their own album of the masterpieces that you can keep forever!!